[tGE AU] random 4th-wall silliness

[valmora]

Disclaimer: the characters of The Great Escape do not belong to me; they belong to MGM/UA and Paul Brickhill. No profit was made from the use of these characters, and all alterations to situation and personality are my fault, not the company's. The other movies mentioned here belong to their respective companies, not to me.



RJ, abandoned by Sandy and Roger in favor of ogling the coffee shop, peers into the windows of the Blockbuster. There's a sale of outdated VHS tapes, five for as many bucks, and he squints in the effort to read the titles, vision clouded at the edges by dark smears of mascara.

Gives up and enters, going through the stacks and wondering if there's anything good hidden in between the piles of feel-good rehashed Disney flicks and bang-bang-shoot-'em-ups. He finds a Bond film, a Sean Connery, and contemplates buying it until he realizes it's "From Russia With Love" and Sandy would throw a bitchfest if he tried, since the three of them saw that during the Bond marathon over the summer.

Keeps looking - a mangled-coveed copy of the lame sequel to Aladdin, and "Lion King 1 1/2," plus some freaky foreign film that looks like a lot of people jabbering on about nothing important and then killing each other. A Hong Kong kung-fu movie, and -

"Nothing good," RJ preemptively informs Roger, whose face falls. "Or at least, nothing that I've found yet."

"We could always watch Bill'n'Ted," Sandy suggests, "If you don't mind your ears bleeding from the stupidity." RJ leans over and sniffs Sandy's coffee cup. A super-grande-espresso. Sandy'll be up a while, and God knows how he managed to get it into the store without the clerks noticing.

"You just want to ogle Keanu Reeves," RJ quips. "Don't lie."

Roger pantomimes gagging behind Sandy's back, then says, "Look, old movies. Anything good?" He flips over a couple of the boxes to read the teasers. "Walter Mathau?"

"Maybe," RJ says. "Howabout this one?" He holds up the case, back facing Sandy and Roger so they can read it.

"I guess. It's supposed to be kind of derivative, though," Roger says.

"It's really famous," Sandy rebuts. "I think they remade it or something."

"It at least looks exciting."

Roger crosses his arms over his chest. "I guess you could say that," he admits, but not easily. "I know some of the names, anyway."

"So you want it?" RJ asks.

"Yeah," Sandy answers. "We do."

"All right," RJ says, and sets 'The Magnificent Seven' down in the 'to buy' pile.

Comments

[addandsubtract.livejournal.com]

I think I just died laughing.

This also gave me the absurd urge to write an Eric crying fic. I don't even know.

I think it would take them awhile to get over the fact that all of their names correspond to these characters. There'd be a whole awkward section of them just going:
RJ: But... I'm, and he's....
Sandy: I know. It's so weird.

And then they'd have to get on Danny and Willie's case at school, and snark at them about romantic water music and running away together.

And then Eric would cry. Just because.

[valmora.livejournal.com]

the absurd urge to write an Eric crying fic
Does Louis get a pity fuck? Because if yes, then I'm all for it.

it would take them awhile to get over the fact that all of their names correspond to these characters
And Sandy should be disturbed at the end when everyone dies. He should have little prescient flashes of horror and disturbance.

running away together
Roger: They'll elope to get away from Danny's Catholic parents.
Sandy: Willie doesn't speak Polish. The point is moot.
RJ: You're both sick.
Sandy: SAYS THE BOY WHO WANTS TO SHAG THE KOMMANDANT.
Roger: Ssh. People are staring.
RJ: You are SO married. XD XD XD
Roger: I resent that remark. I'm straight.
Sandy: I resent that remark. Boys are stupid.

Just because.
He wants Louis to comfort him.

[darsnape-dracul.livejournal.com]

[follows conversation intently, even though plot is over her head] [snicker] [snicker] [guffaw] [laugh and fall on bed] [giggle sporadically]

[valmora.livejournal.com]

This will make a LOT more sense when you've seen the movie and know the specific scenes to which I'm referring. At least, one hopes it will.

[addandsubtract.livejournal.com]

Louis gets an anytime-he-wants fuck. But maybe some confort!sex?

::laughs at the conversation:: And if Danny and Willie were there, they'd just be confused, and back away slowly.

Hm, I haven't written Eirc yet. Maybe after NaNo. And after I finish the prom!thing. Heh.

[valmora.livejournal.com]

But maybe some comfort!sex?
Sounds good to me. =)

and back away slowly.
Probably more than slowly. Either that, or Danny would just stand there, baffled. He doesn't know what "shag" means yet. =)

Maybe after NaNo.
I can wait. =)